30 in 30: Day 26 (please don’t do this, future authors)

I Have Stuck With Harry Until the Very End
Image by Thalita Carvalho ϟ via Flickr

OMG WTF? OR most irritating/awful/annoying book ending

The Epilogue, Harry Potter.

JK Rowling said (somewhere; I don’t have a quote) she wrote the epilogue before she wrote the rest of the series.

It shows.

The ending of the book was really satisfying. And then you read “Nineteen years later…” and your entire evening is ruined. It’s so trite, so contrived, so fanfic-ish — wait, that’s unfair to fanfic writers, because I’m pretty sure most of them could have written a much better epilogue.

Where was the rebuilding of the Wizard World after the fall of Voldemort? Where was the extreme PTSD the Golden Trio must be suffering? Where was the real, gritty storyline?

Instead we get ALBUS SEVERUS ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME.

It was such a disservice to the characters, to just make everything happily ever after and so normal. After an adolescence like that, Harry, Ron, and Hermione’s lives would never be any sort of normal again.

Give me an epilogue where Harry has a drinking problem and Hermione doesn’t read anymore, where Ron is suddenly responsible because his wife has gone off the deep end and someone has got to keep things together. Neville is a chronic pot smoker because herbology has to come in handy in some way, Ginny has said “fuck you” to Harry’s bullshit but we all know she flies Quidditch that hard so she can forget everything, being dangerous on the field because it’s much better than trying to take care of herself — how can she, when her family members and friends are dead?

That’s much more believable.

(Don’t get me wrong, I love the series and it means a lot to me. But I wouldn’t be a real fan if I couldn’t look at its flaws and talk about them without evasion.)